too sensitive

sometimes i can be way too sensitive. i let people influence my mood way too much. i can be feeling great about myself, confident in everything i do, and feel like i have friends who really encourage me. but then i get 1 weird look or hear a not so great comment (it could even just be from a random person) and suddenly i’m not so happy, i’m not so confident, and i start to question myself. i wonder if who i am and what i’m doing really matters all that much to people or sometimes, even to myself.

so much of what i see in myself depends on what the people around me see. how i feel about myself depends on how other people feel about me. that’s such a fragile state and i really hate that i give people that much power over me.

it’s not fair to me but it’s not fair to those around me either. they are as human as i am and i have to allow them to make mistakes too.

i didn’t really have a purpose behind this other than just to say some of these things “out loud”.